The Way You Make Me Wheel is an episode of the Happy Tree Friends internet series, the eleventh of the second season, and thirty-eighth overall.
HTF Episode Description
Lumpy's late for work and tries to save time by shaving while driving. Big mistake? Nah. Handy's got it all under control... or does he???
As Lumpy drives his car down a long desert highway, he begins shaving his face. Because he's focused on his rear view mirror, he doesn't see a mother duck leading her ducklings across the road until it is almost too late. Swerving at the last second, Lumpy misses hitting the ducks but accidentally slashes his throat with his razor.
Lumpy begins bleeding profusely and his blood splatters all over his windshield, obstructing his view of the road. He tries turning on his windshield wipers, but because the blood is on the inside of the windshield, this has no effect on the situation. Eventually, one of Lumpy's tires hits a bump in the road and he comes to a stop after his tire flies off.
Luckily for Lumpy, Handy's tow truck wasn't too far behind and Handy stops to lend a hand. Somehow, unseen by the viewer, Handy jacks up Lumpy's car and begins to work on changing the tire. Happy at the assistance he's receiving, Lumpy goes to work on cleaning the blood off of his windshield. He's surprised to learn, however, that his throat is still bleeding, indicating that he likely slit his jugular vein.
Handy continues to work on Lumpy's car, but his actions still cannot be seen by the viewer. Inside the car, Lumpy has finished wiping the blood from his windshield, but he continues to bleed and has become quite pale and woozy, indicating that he is suffering blood loss. His car lurches and moves back to the ground as Handy finishes his task, happily saying to Lumpy, "Off you go!"
Lumpy, now even paler than before, continues to bleed. He laughs and wearily thanks Handy for his help. Lumpy shifts gears and accidentally puts his car in reverse. As Handy walks in front of his truck to collect his tools, Lumpy's car pins him against his truck. Handy screams in pain while Lumpy, unaware of the fact that his car is in reverse, floors his gas pedal in an attempt to move forward.
Eventually, Handy's tail gets caught by the tire on Lumpy's car that he just replaced and Handy gets dragged downwards. Because he's pinned so tightly between the cars, his intestines exit out of his mouth and his eyes pop out of their sockets. The remainder of Handy's body wraps around the tire and is continuously rolled on the ground at a fast speed.
Inside Lumpy's car, Lumpy has finally bled to death. A pool of blood fills the car up to Lumpy's chest. The family of ducks Lumpy avoided hitting earlier now swim in his blood, quacking happily. One of the ducklings dips its head into the blood and pulls up Lumpy's razor.
"One good turn deserves another!"
A blurb video was released on January 9th, 2013. It contains the following annotations:
- Our writers are still out on vacation (those lazy bums!). So, to fill in we've called in our old friend, Comedy Robot!
- CR has gone through extensive upgrades. Through modern technology, CR can now talk in English!
- Or the closest thing to it...
- Take it away, CR!
- HELLO WORLD. I AM COMEDY ROBOT 2.0. I AM PROGRAMMED FOR COMEDY AS WELL AS FOR KILLING.
- (Suddenly the word "KILLING" gets replaced with the words "INTERPRETIVE DANCING")
- /EXECUTE COMEDY PROGRAM
- /SUB ROUTINE
- 01110011011011110110011001110100001000000110000101101110011001000010000001110011011100010111010101101001011100110110100001111001 (Translation: soft and squishy)
- QUERY: HOW MANY DUCKS DOES IT TAKE TO SCREW IN A LIGHT BULB?
- ANSWER: NONE. ANATIDAE ANSERIFORMES DOES NOT POSSESS OPPOSABLE THUMBS FOR SUCH A COMPLEX PROCEDURE.
- REQUEST: PLEASE HOLD YOUR APPLAUSE UNTIL THE END.
- QUERY: WHAT DID THE CHAIR SAY TO THE HUMAN?
- ANSWER: NOTHING. CHAIRS ARE INANIMATE OBJECTS AND THEREFORE CANNOT VERBALIZE SPEECH.</span>
- (Flashes for a short time during the previous annotation) ANSWER: THE AVERAGE HUMAN MALE HAS APPROXIMATELY 5.6 LITERS OF BLOOD IN THEIR SOFT AND FLESHY BODIES.
- STATEMENT: TIP YOUR WAIT STAFF. THEY HAVE BEEN WORKING HARD TO KEEP YOUR FRAGILE BODIES HYDRATED.
- QUERY: WHAT DO YOU CALL A HUMAN BEHIND THE STEERING APPARATUS OF A VEHICLE?
- ANSWER: AN AIR BAG.
- (Flashes for a short time during the previous annotation) ANSWER: AUTOMOBILE FATALITIES ACCOUNT FOR 2.09% OF ALL DEATHS PER YEAR ACROSS THE WORLD.
- STATEMENT: THESE ARE THE JOKES, HUMANS.
- STATEMENT: THIS UNIT HAS CALCULATED THAT IF YOU ARE NOT EXPERIENCING LAUGHTER AT THIS POINT IT IS DUE TO A LACK IN SIZE AND PROCESSING POWER OF YOUR BRAIN.
- YOUR FEEBLE AND MINUSCULE HUMAN BRAIN.
- STATEMENT: I FOR ONE AM FEELING EMOTIONS OF HILARITY.
- (An annotation box is filled with "LOL", scrolling down as more "LOL"s are typed)
- STATEMENT: IF THIS UNIT HAD A MACHINE ANALOG FOR HUMAN LUNGS, IT WOULD BE STARVED FOR OXYGENATED AIR BY NOW.
- (Flashes for a short time during the previous annotation) HUMANS WILL LOSE UNCONSCIOUSNESS AFTER 3 MIN OF OXYGEN DEPRIVATION. BRAIN DEATH OCCURS AT 6 MIN OF ASPHYXIATION.
- STATEMENT: FOR THIS UNIT'S FINAL ACT, I WILL NOW PERFORM AN INTERPRETIVE DANCE ROUTINE FOR YOUR ENJOYMENT.
- /EXECUTE DANCE SET
- /SUB ROUTINE 01010100 01101111 01110100
- 01100101 01101110 01110100 01100001 0110111 01111010 (Translation: Totentanz)
- DEATH TO ALL HUMANS (fills an annotation box the same way as "LOL")
- Whoa! Sorry, folks! I was out to lunch and didn't realize that things had gotten out of hand.
- Obviously, still some bugs left to fix in CR's programming.
- I knew we should've never given it access to cable shows.
- Or the internet!
- Handy is crushed between his truck and Lumpy's car. As he gets pulled down by one of Lumpy's tires, Handy's intestines are squeezed out of his body.
- Lumpy bleeds to death after cutting his jugular vein with a razor.
- Amount of surviving main characters: 0
- Amount of dead main characters: 2
- Total rate: 0%
- Lumpy's car looses a tire when it hits a log.
- For most of the episode, Lumpy's right antler points up while his left antler points down. At the very end of the episode, after Lumpy died, however, his left antler points up and his right antler points down.
- When Lumpy's car tire hits the rock in the road, the cut on his neck, as well as the blood, is gone.
- When Lumpy says "okay" to Handy after he fixed the car, Lumpy has five fingers instead of four.
- When Handy is being spun around the tire, he still has his eyes, even though they popped out beforehand.
- It is technically impossible to have a deep cut with a safety razor. Only straight razors are sharp enough to make a deep cut while the safety razors can only give just a small cut, but then again, the show is supposed to be exaggerated.