User blog:HarmonTower805/Happy Tree Friends Battle (Season 2) Episode 1: Oh, This Again?

SEW: (Sigh) Well, Happy 22nd Birthday to Me

(Blows out Candle on a Cupcake)

SEW: Okay, now what?

Nick: Well, you’ve been hibernating for almost 3 years now, and barely anyone has seen you, so why not go and catch up with...

SEW: You idiot, Wolves don’t hibernate, I made that up so that people would leave me alone...

Nick: As I was saying!! I think it would be a good idea for you to catch up with people you haven’t met since then

SEW: Like who?

Nick: Like…The guys from HTF Battle!!

SEW: The cast of that flop shot I did back in 2015?

Nick: Well, it was low budget, but It wasn’t a flop…well at least in my opinion

SEW: You call 17% on Rotten Tomatoes and 3.3 on IMDB NOT A FLOP!!!

Nick: Well, both were based on 6 Reviewers, so don’t be so hard on yourself

SEW: I really don’t want to look back on that show, so many cringe memories; Bad Grammar, the horrible Dialogue, the Fact that these characters has 0 personality traits!!!

Nick: Well, if you did the show again, maybe you can do a lot better

SEW: Yeah I…Wait, WHAT??

Nick: I mean, 2nd Seasons could not only redeem Characters that performed blandly last season, but it could redeem you as a host people can actually take seriously!!

SEW: But I can’t host again, what if I embarrass myself again, and possibly destroy the reputation of these contestants like almost I did with that blue one…

Nick: Splendid?

SEW: No, the girl…

Nick: Petunia?

SEW: Yeah, her

NIck: Oh, but don’t worry, I could help you out as a Co-Host

SEW: I guess that would be nice, but I don’t want to have to play with like 30 contestants…

Nick: It was 22, and plus, we can shorten down to like, 14 or 15 if you want…

SEW: That would be better, it would anyone watch it, it’s been almost 3 years as you said…

Nick: If you make an epic comeback, maybe you can regain more views than last season!!

SEW: You really think so?

Nick: Yeah, also…I’m pretty sure you left a poll out for people to choose the next contestants for Season 2, but it’s been left untouched since your “hiatus”

SEW: Did I really? Let me see it

Nick: Hold on, let me see if I can find it? Aha! Here it is, it was in the bottom of my Google Drive…It says here that the 14 most popular choices are...

Flippy Cuddles Flaky Mime Handy Toothy Russell Shifty Lifty Giggles Sniffles Nutty Splendid Petunia

SEW: Wow, I never expected people like Russell, Nutty, Lifty, Shifty, or Handy to get enough votes…

Nick: Well, they got enough votes, so let’s go get everything set up for the show…

SEW: But how did we do that without having that overly low budget feel to it, last season we just did everything in the woods with only 2 smalls cameras!!

Nick: Well, I know a friend who has a farm area that could be willing to give you it, I’ll have to ask him first though, then we plan the challenges and how we display the elimination.

SEW: That seems like a lot of work, but hey, whatever it takes to make us look like we are be taken seriously!!

Nick: Alright then, let’s get to work!!

(3 Months Later)

(Cuddles’s Phone Rings)

Cuddles: UGGH!!! Who is calling me at…2 A.M????

(Answers the Phone Groggily)

SEW: Hello Contestants!!

Cuddles: Wait, I know that voice…Speed E. Wolf? Is that you??

SEW: It’s me alright, and not only am I calling 14 people on a single phone…But I am proud to announce that the Second Season of HTF Battle is officially here!!!

Giggles: Wait…WHAT, I’m though this should ended a long time ago!! Like 4 years ago

Sniffles: Actually, the last episode was aired on March 27, 2015 which is about 2 years, 11 Months, and a day

Russell: Nobody asked!!

SEW: Anyways, were doing things a little differently this Season; Firstly, we’re only allowing 14 Contestants to save time (and money) so I’m sorry to Lammy, Mole, Cub, Pop, Truffles, Cro-Marmot, Disco Bear, or Lumpy, they won’t be participating

Cuddles: Ah…Lumpy!!

Petunia: Thank God, that Disco Bear is not going to be on this show...

Toothy: Wait, does that mean Splendid is on this show??

Splendid: Apparently so…

SEW: So, instead of just telling you where the show will be held at. I decided to make that your first challenge?

Nutty: Wh-wh-what??

Sniffles: He means that our first challenge is to find the location of the show ourselves.

SEW: Correct Snorkels!!

Sniffles: It’s Sniffles…

SEW: Sorry! Anyways, as Sniffles said, so you guys will be searching for the location, but I added a little twist; the first 2 people to find it will be team captains, and the last 4 people to arrive at the show will be put up for Elimination…

Everyone: (Gasp)

SEW: So…HOP TO IT!!!!

(Hangs Up)

Everyone: …AHHHHHHH!!!!!

Splendid: Well, this shouldn’t be to hard for me, as a super hero…Oh Wait, he never gave any clues, I guess I can just fly around and…

(Phone Rings)

Splendid: Hello?

SEW: Splendid, you can't use your powers…That would be cheating and would result in an immediate disqualification!

(Hangs Up)

Splendid: Darn it!!! Well, I must be on my way then; Up, Up, and…Out the Door I Go…

Sniffles: I know I may be a whizz at Math and Science, but I have no idea to locate him without a single clue, I guess I could try to trace the call, but I’d need to know his phone number…Darn It!!! Well I guess the more logical thing to is, I can’t believe I’m telling myself this, but…Go out and find it myself…Sigh!!

(Meanwhile)

Cuddles: TOOTHY!!! GIGGLES!!! Come on, we gotta go find this place…Alliance Right?

Giggles: I'm not sure Cuddles, I'm mean, I'm all for it, but I'm just afraid that will be targeted as a threat, and voted out by the viewers!!

Cuddles: But we got so far in the last season as an alliance didn't we; Toothy got 7th, I got 2nd and Giggles got...

Giggles: 17th...

Cuddles: Oh, well... how about we talk about this later, the more time we spend talking, the more the chances of us being up for voting, and that's not how I would like us to start off the second season...

Toothy: He's got a point, Let's go!!

(Meanwhile)

Russell: Yar, I'm usually good at finding things, but without a map and without an "X" I have no idea how my going to get there, sigh, now what do I do?

(Sees Sniffles and Nutty Passing By)

Russell: Ahoy Mateys, Are you guys stumped too?

Sniffles: Yeah, I couldn't really think of a logical way to locate this place, so me and Nutty are just going to have to find it the old fashioned way...WALKING!!

Nutty: L-L-Loo-Loo-LOOK OUT???

(Jumps and pushes Sniffles and Russell out of the way as Lifty and Shifty's Van zooms by)

Nutty: Wa-ha-ha!! That was too close

Russell: I know right the nerve of those too, plus they have a van so technically when that be cheating??

Sniffles: Well, they are just as lost as we are so the only advantage that they really have is speed, and that's pretty much it...

Russell: I guess your right, but still we need to find a way to get to that location and fast...

Sniffles: Right, and we just need to figure out how to do that

(Meanwhile)

Flippy: I'm surprise that people wanted me back for another season, Flaky, I mean, not to be rude or anything, but I did win last season...

Flaky: True, but you're a fan favorite, they really want to see how well you'll do this season compared to the last!

Flippy: True

Flaky: So how, do we find this area that he was talking about, he gave no clues or anything

Flippy: Not sure, but we can guess due to last season being a disaster because it was done in a forest, he'd want to move out in more of an open area, Right?

Flaky: Sounds reasonable

Flippy: So lets check out the wide open areas, maybe we'll find it, it's not like he's doing it in India or something

Flaky: Ok, say do you think Petunia would want to be in an alliance with us, I mean; I know she has Handy, but since that whole "incident" last season, and because I'm nice I'm just thinking that...

Petunia: Of course!!

Flaky: GAH! Don't scare us like that!!

Petunia: Sorry I didn't mean to, anyways I noticed you guys here and thought that you may have an idea on where this show's place is, but then I overheard the whole thing about; alliances, Handy, and that's "incident" from like, last season that I really don't want to discuss!! I just want to say that, Yes! I would love to join your alliance, hopefully we can leave our past behind us!!

Flippy: Well I guess that's settled

(Meanwhile)

Handy: Grrr!! I can't believe Petunia didn't want to work with me, although I guess she hasn't really forgiven me for that "incident" last season, then again I haven't forgiven her for what happened in Episode 2!! I really need to ally with someone, and fast!! Cause I don't want to be first voted out again!! And who knows, maybe I'll get my revenge on those who did me wrong last season!!

(Notices Splendid walking by)

Handy: And opportunity knocks...

(Walks over)

Handy: Hey, Splendid!!!

Splendid: Oh, Hey...uh, Handy...

Handy: Look, I know this may seem sudden and spontaneous, but....Wanna form an alliance?

Splendid: Sorry kid, a true superhero like me doesn't team up with common folk...We work alone, and to me, working independently gets the job done faster and efficiently and...

Handy: Results in the deaths of over 100 people!!

Splendid: ....Okay, you got me there

Handy: Plus, I can repair both our reputations, cause let's face it, we're technically the outcasts that are more likely to get our first!!

Splendid: How will you do that? That doesn't seem easy considering that you falsely exposed Petunia and Cuddles in front of the viewers! Which was kind of a jerky move...

Handy: And you killed Toothy and Cuddles after falsely accusing them of betraying your alliance! Which was kind of a jerky move...

Splendid: Darn it!! You got me again...I guess now that I think about it, were not that different after all...It would make sense for us to make an alliance!

Handy: So what do you say, Splendid! Can we shake on it?

Splendid: (Sigh) No...

(Splendid Walks Away)

Handy: $@%#!!!!

(Meanwhile) Mime: (Thinking) Oh Boy! Another season and another opportunity, hopefully I just won’t be voted out early. I need to show viewers that I’m more than a stereotypical Mime that does nothing but….mime…

(Comes Across A River)

Mime: (Thinking) Hmmm…It would make sense that the host would choose a multi-purpose area to hold the show, so maybe if I…

Sniffles: Hello Mime!

Mime: Wah!! You guys scared me…

Sniffles: Sorry, we were just wondering if you’d like to join or alliance? We may have 3 people already, but we’re happy to invite others

Nutty: Safety in numbers…Rah-ha-ha-haight!!

Mime: (Thinking) Shoot! I can’t say no, cause that would make them hate me and want to vote me out, and if I say yes, I may be in danger of becoming a threat, I have to find a way to get out of this conversation…

Russell: So what do you say matey?

Mime: Well I would…

(Pretends to Trip on a Rock and Fall Backwards into the River)

Russell, Nutty, Sniffles: MIME!!!!!

(Rush to the River’s Edge)

Nutty: Where di-he-he-he-he go?

Russell: I’ll save you!!!

(Jumps in the Water, Only to land on a rock and split his Peg Leg)

Russell: AHH!!!! MY LEG!!!!

Sniffles: (Runs into the Water) MIME!! WHERE ARE YOU???

Nutty: I don’t think he-he-he wants to be in our alliance, Sniffles

Sniffles: Nonsense!!! He wanted to say yes, but wasn’t able to because he slipped

Russell: Can someone help out???

(Meanwhile)

Shifty: Teheeheeheeheeheehee!! I’m so glad I took the van before Lifty hung up the phone, Looks like he won’t be able to….Wait…WHAT THE…!!!!!

(Lifty is seen driving a motorcycle, he passes the van, glances at Shifty with a smirk before speeding away)

Shifty: Shoot!!I I forgot about the motorcycle, Eh! He doesn’t even know where he’s going anyway...

(Meanwhile)

Toothy: Cuddles…We’ve been walking through these woods for over an hour, I have a bad feeling that other people may have found it before us!!

Cuddles: That quickly?? I don’t think so...Oh look, I can see the edge of the forest, maybe we are get

(Runs ahead and After reaching the edge, he realizes that the edge of the forsest actually is the edge of a cliff)

Cuddles: Wah...OH MY GOSH!!!!

(Managed to grab a Tree Branch)

Toothy and Giggles: CUDDLES!!!!

(Run over and grab him before the branch breaks)

Cuddles: Phew! That was a close one…

Toothy: (Peering into the Distance) Wait…I SEE IT!! I SEE IT!!!! I SEE THE SHOW!!!!!

Giggles: What? Where?

Toothy: Down there, that farm!! See all the camera equipment?

Cuddles: I see it too!! and it’s probably only a fews miles away, and there doesn’t seem to be anyone else there, We can still make it! Let’s go!!

(Meanwhile)

Mime: (Thinking) Phew! Glad I manage to get out of that conversation, Now as I go down this river, I’ll be passing the forest, the farm, and the meadow. The show has to be on one of those place, if not, I may have to go back up stream…I just have to make sure that I’m not being...

Sniffles: MIME!! MIME!!

Mime: Shoot!!

(Dives Underwater)

Nutty: I-I-I-I don’t see him anywhere, Sniffles…Like I s-eh-eh-ehd, Maybe he doesn’t want to…

Sniffles: If he really didn’t want to be in our alliance, What good would jumping in the river be, that would be like running into a school just because you don’t want to be on a dodgeball team, It would make sense, so we have to find him, hopefully he’ll be alive

Russell: Makes sense…But do you think Mime could still be alive? We’ve been searching for over 5 minutes.

Sniffles: I’ve resuscitated people who have been underwater for hours, I have know we can find him!! Let’s just keep following this river.

Mime: Shoot!! If they’re following me, they could find the show before me…Then again if I’m not going the right direction…What am I thinking? It has to be in an open area, it just has to be, it just makes sense.

(Meanwhile)

Flippy: Something tell’s me that we’re getting close, my instincts tell me that if we go through this meadow and around that cliff, we’ll make it

Petunia: What makes you so sure Flippy? It’s not like your a professional...

Flippy: Tire Tracks, and they seem pretty fresh if you ask me

Petunia: Oh…Whoops, I guess I never noticed that

Flippy: It’s quite alright, Let’s go!!

(Flippy takes a few steps out into the meadow, but steps into a puddles of mud)

Petunia: Wait…There’s MUD!!!!????

Flaky: Oh No, Petunia, we’re not doing this again, If you want to be in our alliance, you’ll have to deal with a little dirt. It won’t kill you

Petunia: But it could have germs and bacteria and viruses

Flippy: If mud makes you that uptight, how about I carry you

Petunia: Must you?

Flippy: Would you rather do it Piggyback?

Petunia: No thank you!!

(Meanwhile)

Handy: Excuse Me Sir, Have you seen any van, or truck that was carrying camera equipment or  anything for like a game show around here?

Road Maintenance Worker: Sorry Son, I haven’t seen any vans pass by around here lately…

Handy: Thanks

(Walks Away)

Handy: Darn it!! What must I have to do as an individual to find this place, I’ve tried the nearby road maintenance team, an electronics store, a mechanic, and a Party City!!! WHERE IS THAT STUPID PLACE!!!

Ranger: Excuse me son, are you lost?

Handy: No, I’m just looking for this game show, I’m participating in, apparently the host wants us to find the place where the show is, but didn’t leave us any clues…He just expected us to find it!!

Ranger: Well he’s not a very good host if he doesn’t even have any clues

Handy: That’s the understatement of the year, I’ve tried looking everywhere for clues of their presence such as electronic or maintenance stores if they wanted to get last minute supplies…and I…

Ranger: Wait, hold on, What’s this

(Looks at a Lens Cap on the road and Picks It Up)

Ranger: It looks like a lens cap, I’m guessing that wherever the place your looking for is either near the mountains, into the meadow area

Handy: Maybe! But that would mean I have to go two different way and that may take sometime

Ranger: Well, I wish you the best of luck, I hope you find this place!!

Handy: Thanks!

(Ranger walks away)

Handy: Hmmm…Which path should I take first?

(Looks at the two signs)

Handy: Aha! I’ll go this way, the meadow!!

(Runs toward the Mountain Area)

Shifty: Teeheeheeheehee!!! Looks like someone took a wrong turn…

(Switches Signs Back to Normal, and clears the shrubbery covering his car)

Shifty: Now to…

Lifty: SHIFTY LOOK OUT!!!!

Shifty: Wait? WHAT???

(Lifty crashes his motorcycle into the front of Shifty’s Van, causing him to eject from his seat, fly over the van and land head first in a pile of poison oak)

Shifty: OMG!!! My van!!

(Lifty emerges from the pile covered in blisters)

Lifty: Seriously? You didn’t even care that I could have died!!!???

Shifty: But the van was expensive…

Lifty: YOU!! ARE!! THE WORST!!!!

(Runs down the path angrily)

Shifty: Ah…darn the engine is broken…AND I AIN’T PAYING FOR THAT!!!

(Runs after him)

(Meanwhile)

SEW: Oh look, I see some contestants now!

Cuddles, Giggles, Toothy, Petunia, Flaky, Flippy: I see the finish line!!

Russell: Looks like we reached the end of the meadow area, and look, I see some other people, we may be able to win this if we hurry!!

Sniffles: Come on let’s go Nutty!!

Nutty: What ab-oooooooout Mime??

Sniffles: DOH! Well, we can’t forget him either, Russell!! Nutty!! How about you guys go and at last try to claim one of the two spots, I’ll keep search for Mime

(A few hundred feet down the river, Mime emerges out from the water and spits out a reed he used to breathe)

Mime: GASP!!!! (Thinking) Phew…I think I lost them, and it looks like I’ve arrived too, lucky me…that’s the last time I try to submarine my way down the river...

Sniffles: MIME!! OMG You’re safe!! I thought you were a goner back there, let me check to make sure you don’t have any internal injuries!!

Mime: No time!! I, I mean we need to run!!

Sniffles: Okay, let’s hurry!!

Splendid: (Running without going into super mode) The finish line, I can see it!! Just…Can’t….USE….POWERS!!!!

Cuddles: HURRY!!!

Flaky: ALMOST THERE!!!

Lifty: SO CLOSE!!!!

Giggles: LOOK OUT!!!

SEW: And the team captains are...

SEW: Russell and Toothy!!!

Russell and Toothy: YEAH!!!!

RANKINGS

3rd Place - Cuddles

4th Place - Nutty

5th Place - Giggles

6th Place - Flippy

7th Place - Flaky

8th Place -  Petunia

9th Place - Splendid

10th Place - Shifty

11th Place - Lifty

12th Place - Mime

13th Place - Sniffles

14th Place (Not Arrived) - Handy

SEW: And it seems that Handy has not arrived yet either. Nevertheless, it looks like the Bottom 4 are Lifty, Mime, Sniffles, and Handy are up for Elimination!!

Mime: (Thinking) Shoot!! I thought my plan would work

____________________________________________________________________

SEW: So now, viewers it is time to vote once again, but remember...

DO NOT VOTE IN THE COMMENTS!!!

VOTING WILL BE IN A POLL IN WHICH YOU CAN VOTE  2 PEOPLE TO LIKE, AND 2 PEOPLE TO DISLIKE, THE LINK TO THE POLLS WILL BE BELOW!!

Vote: https://docs.google.com/forms/d/1G90VS0FtEuq6OcX-XeoahsnQm1L4KLHp3WZijPDJFtE

VOTING ENDS: March 3rd

____________________________________________________________________

Cuddles: Congrats Toothy, I never knew that you’d make it, but you deserve the Team Captain spot for once!!

Giggles: Yeah! Congrats!

Toothy: Thanks Cuddles: At least we’ll be all on the same team!!

(Meanwhile)

Sniffles: Nope, looks like you’re all good, Mime, there seems to no signs of internal damage to organs, I’m surprised since you’ve been underwater for so long…

Mime: (Sarcastically) Thanks Sniffles, I owe you big time…

Sniffles: Don’t mention it, it was my pleasure to help a friend like you, even if it cost me my win!!

Mime: (Smiles)

Sniffles: So about that question earlier…

Mime: (Thinking) OH COME ON!!!!